Month: August 2013

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Bahleeted

Now that SSM has been doxed elsewhere this just isn’t fun anymore, sorry. I hope my coauthors agree.

(I do not approve of teh doxing 😦 )

Edited to clarify: After finding out a few more details about Sunshine Mary’s life, the fun has gone out of trolling her because you can’t really troll someone you feel sorry for. It’s like kicking a puppy. “Sunshine Mary” was easy to troll. She was a hilariously inept “Christian” “antifeminist” with about as much self-awareness as a taco, and the Internet knowledge of my 93-year-old great-grandmother (“Someone hacked into my facebook account and stole this picture that I had set on public! And they stole my IP address!”). She was also a liar and a hypocrite (crying to WordPress mods when someone put up a picture of her kids up with their faces blacked out, and yet threatening to shop this blog’s owners to the CPS in the comments section. Oh, not to mention charging people with DMCA violations despite the fact that about 95% of the pictures on her blog are stolen.)

Sunshine T**** is all of these things, I guess. But she’s also a sad middle-aged woman who lives in a lousy neighborhood. Her super “alpha” husband is a male nurse* with a massive inferiority complex who has cheated on her 30 times. Judging by SSM’s occasional straying-from-the-MRA-party-line followed by quick backtracking, HHG is still holding the threat of more cheating over her head and is one insufficiently submissive spanking-reception away from going back to his old ways. Those of us who aren’t sheltered narcissists know that for the sort of person that HHG apparently is, nothing is enough – if he wants to cheat again, he will cheat again, and it doesn’t matter how many knives you wash by hand or how many MRA basement-dwellers you defend online. Eventually, it’s going to happen, and I think even Sunshine knows that on some level, which is probably one of the reasons she is so detached from reality (HHG is totally a doctor!!! I am upper middle class and live in Ann Arbor!). She must also realize on some level that her blog’s “fans” will keep up their adoration for her for exactly as long as she keeps agreeing with them and trashing other women. Any divergence from that and they will have as much use for her as a used Kleenex.

But is that what really made me feel so bad for her? No. It was finding out that she only has one bathroom in her house. Among six people. I mean, wow. I’d probably develop a mental illness if I had to live like that for 20 years, too.

Anyway, I am tossing up whether to put the old entries back up, but this place probably won’t be updating anymore.

Wow, that ended up long.

* I have nothing but respect for nurses, male or female, of course. But HHG the ultra-manly woman-spanking dominant alpha being a nurse is just so wonderful. Can you imagine all the female doctors and administrators he has to take orders from? I wonder if he threatens to confiscate their equipment if they’re not using it properly and then accuses them of being “feminists” when they ignore him…

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Ask Sunshine Mary: Answers!

HolyhandgrenadePhil writes:

If you’d have used your mouth instead of your hand, you wouldn’t have tendonitis.

That’s all I’m saying.

That is not even a question 😦

Andrea writes:

How do you keep the anger, hurt and resentment under control so that you can be the submissive wife your husband needs?

What anger, hurt, and resentment? Blogging thousands of words weekly about how other women suck is obviously the result of happiness and security, and I really feel sorry for you if you don’t realize that.

If you have anger, hurt and resentment in your life, Andrea, you should consider having children. It is totally the cure for any kind of human suffering (I think it even says so in the Bible. I would check, but for some reason my copy keeps bursting into flames whenever I touch it). I had four daughters and just look at how sanctified I am.

Also, how do you protect yourself from STIs since you don’t believe in using condoms?

I don’t know what you’re talking about or what that doctor told you, but neither me nor HHG has an STI. Only slutty fat feminists get STIs and anyway, it’s just a rash caused by these crotchless panties.

Elphaba writes:

Rumor has it your readers have dubbed themselves “The Celibate Gang.” Are incel males both married and un your target market?

I don’t know where you heard this “rumor”, Elphaba, but chances are you are an unhappy fat feminist spinster who doesn’t even have side bangs. It is logically impossible for my followers to be incel, because they read my blog and are therefore dominant alpha males who can turn on sex-crazed feminine submission like a light switch. In fact, my readers should be admired for their restraint. They COULD be having all the sex and meaningful relationships and non-basement domiciles they want, but they are choosing not to in order to fight feminism.

However, if by chance an incel male or two DOES wander onto my blog (maybe he is married but his wife is a fat brainwashed feminist slut and even his alpha charms don’t work on her, and even slapping her around doesn’t help) I will soon be marketing a Sunshine Mary blow-up doll to service their needs. She will feature side bangs, a black turtleneck, baggy mom jeans, black eyeliner, and crotchless panties, and she will look at least ten years younger than her age. Oh, and of course she will have a realistic “love tank” for needy readers to fill up. Expect a kickstarter project soon 🙂

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Ask Sunshine Mary

Hello internet! I can’t type much today because I have tendonitis in one wrist (one of the perks of being a submissive wife LOL) so if there’s anything you’ve been wanting to ask me, please leave it in the comments and I’ll do my best to reply quickly, just as soon as I wash all these knives and repair this broken pager and wash the mysterious perfume smell out of these scrubs while trying not to cry.

Some sample questions you might want to consider:

1. Sunshine Mary, how are you so wonderful and pretty and feminine and awesomely submissive?
2. Sunshine Mary, how do you keep looking like you are in your 30s and not being fat?
3. Sunshine Mary, can you please talk about sex chairs and crotchless panties some more? It’s so sexy and cool when married middle-class 44-year-old women do that!

ASK AWAY 😛

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Healthcare costs and feminism

In today’s healthcare debate, there’s one serious subject that most people in our feminism-haunted world never bring up: the obligation we have, as a society, to pay for the sins of modern women.

I mean, think about it: what percentage of modern health problems can ultimately be attributed to the effects of STDs and delayed childbirth? My guess is around 90-95%.

Consider the people you know who have diabetes. Would they still be so fat if they spent more time running around after children? (I am not fat at all.) Other “illnesses” such as multiple sclerosis and thyroid cancer probably have similar causes.

Mental illness is another category where this applies: many of today’s women brazenly refuse to cure their psychological disorders by having children and/or consuming semen, and then expect taxpayers to pick up the tab for their selfishness.

I am PMSing this week so I can’t go into more details. Thoughts?

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Is it morally wrong to give semen to depressed people who are under 18?

Recently the webmistress of the unaffiliated blog expressed thoughts on the antidepressant effects of semen:

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Of course, these sentiments are generally accepted among the red-pill Manosphere. But this afternoon, while I was closing some drawers that HHG left open (he hates drawers because he says they remind him of bedpans. I don’t know what a doctor really has to do with bedpans he is totally a doctor) I was thinking about this a bit more.

Antidepressants are expensive these days, and have some unpleasant side effects. Moreover, depression seems to be worryingly common. (A lot of my friends, neighbors and relatives seem to look and act quite depressed, especially after I spend a while telling them about me and HHG’s wonderful marriage. Probably because they are realizing just how much happiness they have been deprived of thanks to feminism.)

And yet all this time, men are walking around with what is basically a free pharmacy in their pants. As we all know, men (especially manly ones like my readers) produce far more semen than even the most submissive wives can hope to absorb. Do men have a moral obligation to share this semen with women in the general population?

Of course, I am not recommending that men cheat on their wives (HHG, if you are reading this, PLEASE. We can talk about it.)  But maybe red-pill men have a moral obligation to set up some sort of intercourse-free distribution system, a bit like a blood bank. This would allow women that red-pill men would otherwise not want to access sexually (fat women, lesbians, women over 30, women with tattoos, Churchians, feminists, barrens, etc) to receive the benefits of semen. It might also get around the fact that it’s actually against the law in our feminine-ruled society to have sex with some categories of people (LOL!!)

I am female so of course the actual logistics of this plan are beyond me. What do you think, Sunshine Mary followers?

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“Sunshine Mary Erotica” has become the most common search term leading to this page for some reason

So I figured it was time to update my Twilight fic!!!!! lol

New Twilight Sunshine Mary Erotica, Part II

Sunshine Mary was sitting up in her hospital bed one day looking in a mirror. “I really should post more videos to prove that I look like I am in my thirties,” she thought to herself as suddenly, Edward Cullen the male nurse walked into the room.

“Hello, Sunshine Mary!” he said. “My shift is over and I’ve washed my hands after that incident in Room 4. Bend over so I can fill your love tank.”

“Oh Edward Cullen,” said Sunshine Mary. “I’m really not in the mood. I have a brain tumor caused by humorless feminists. My muscles have atrophied and I am bleeding from my ears.”

Edward Cullen sat down beside the bed. His handsome, manly face took on a serious look. The pink scrubs he was wearing clearly defined his sparkly, muscular form.

“Sunshine Mary, you silly woman,” he said sternly. “Don’t you realize that right now is the most important time for you to enjoy my semen?”

“Why?” asked Sunshine Mary, blinking her pretty eyes femininely.

“Because semen is full of microbiomes and is an antidepressant. This is a scientific fact that has been confirmed by literally millions of studies.”

“Oh!” said Sunshine Mary. “I guess I was being emotional and didn’t realize how important it was to consume your semen.”

“I forgive you, Sunshine Mary. You are a woman, after all.”

Sunshine Mary giggled. Edward Cullen looked stern again. “In fact, because I am Edward Cullen, my semen has properties more magic than even the semen of a regular red-pill MRA alpha male. You see, it contains glitter. Because I am a vampire.”

“Oh Edward Cullen, how wonderful,” exclaimed Sunshine Mary, adjusting her attractive side bangs. “It cures all womanly ailments, and it’s useful when crafting. Is there anything more manly than a male nurse who ejaculates glitter?”

“Maybe if I also drove a mini,” said Edward Cullen. “But I drive a Volvo.”

Then Edward Cullen took off his scrubs to reveal his muscular, alpha form, his firm biceps toned from years of throwing pagers at women. Then he filled Sunshine Mary’s love tank.

“Sunshine Mary,” he said afterwards, “That was great and all, but you know, lying in this hospital bed with your brain tumor is starting to make you fat. Haha, I’m just joking!”

Sunshine Mary laughed and laughed. She was glad that she was not a feminist, so that she could appreciate Edward Cullen’s sophisticated sense of humor.

TO BE CONTINUED…?

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Feminists are perpetually offended.

Everything upsets them, even dumb jokes, and if it upsets them, it needs to be illegal.

On a completely unrelated note, someone is writing a parody blog about me. HHG saw it and threw a fit! (you know, the type when they roll around on the ground letting out a high-pitched wail and banging their fists on the ground. All alpha males do it. You know the type.)

I’ve contacted WordPress, CPS, the FCC, the FBI (stealing IPs is a federal crime, isn’t it?), the Department of Homeland Security, the authorities at the Vision Forum, several local news channels, and my congressman. (911 has stopped answering my calls for some reason – they’re probably dealing with all the violence caused by white knights out there defending fat ungrateful women.)

What should I do next, internet? I am out of ideas, and HHG is sulking in his mini and keeps yelling at me that he won’t come out until the blog is gone. How am I meant to buy groceries without his permission? My children are hungry, internet, and it’s all this stupid, lawfare-happy, humorless feminist’s fault.